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i see the world

no one else sees it for me

…well then. it’s been three whole months, hasn’t it? it has been exactly 83 days since i wrote my last post of the ’23 school year. and now it’s 284 days until i do it again. strange, innit?

i’m currently writing in the cafeteria. it’s been a while since i’ve been here, and i don’t think i missed it. questionable food, cold air, and loud people. i’d expect this from a bar, not here.

of course, that’s not what i want to focus on today. right now, i feel like talking about some things i learned over the summer. maybe you’ll be interested! (read: this is totally just a link dump 0_o)

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this is the way that it is

this is the way that it always will be

so. it’s almost summer break. i may look inactive, but i’m currently writing a countdown for the last week of school. that’s write baby (pun)

but you goblins need content now. so here’s your content.

it’s weird to think that school’s almost over. how many of you remember the first day? week? month? how many of you remember that test you aced? how about the one you failed? how many of you can say they know what happened this year?

in this day and age, how many of us have slowed down? it’s almost impossible with assignment after test after assignment. how many of us have taken time to engage in our passions? we don’t have money. don’t have cars, don’t have time.

until we do.

but when will that be? only a few of us have jobs. only a few of us have permits. and time’s coming like a freight truck.

but how about time? time moves on and on and on forever taking us from a certain past to the uncertain future.

the amount of possibilities every day should stagger the mind. the sheer number of things i could do at any moment is impossible. and i’m sitting here refreshing my inbox. we relive the same few days over and over. when did we forget our dreams? we act as if we get through today our dreams will come back tomorrow.

and no, i don’t have all the answers. i don’t know how to start seeing what could be. but i do know that watering down life’s experience, watering down every little idea and thought to fit the mold isn’t it.

let me pull you aside for a moment. take wrong turns. talk to strangers. open unmarked doors. you are curious, you are smart, you are bored. all you can see right now is a choice between slacking off and working hard. there are so many tiny interesting choices that we could all make and we can’t because we just want to get to tomorrow.

something tells me that you’re never gonna stop
until you get what you want

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everyday you loved me less

each day i loved you more

so spring break’s over. and i don’t know how to feel. like, the break was nice and all. but i have a problem. i… don’t feel like i did it right.

“oh lucas how can you vacation wrong” i don’t feel fulfilled. i feel like i wasted the whole thing, wasting what little time i had. i didn’t go anywhere, didn’t really do anything. and all i can think about is how the next major break is summer break.

we’ve 47 days of school left. i pray for the strength to get through this.

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don’t panic.

i’m writing a little guide to the delightful high school we’re all legally required to cope with. it’s a blog post that will take the next 3 1/2 years to finish. it’ll include notes on the building, the teachers, and more. a real shame then, that we’ll all be off to college or work somewhere before we can use it. ah well, history for history’s sake is a noble cause. my hitchhiker’s guide, coming the summer of 2026.